The usual, expected stories have come out - "everyone else has one, her best friend is getting one from Santa, she can use it for music as well as calls.... the list she has formulated to her advantage is substantial.
And to some extent - I want to give her a phone. I would feel better knowing she could contact me whenever she wants. That I could come charging to her rescue! However, the reality is, I always know where she is! She is SEVEN! She's at home with me, at school or at her Grandparents or her Dad's house. They all have phones. She can use them to call me whenever she likes, and she does! :)
I came to thinking that actually, her request probably only seems scary to me because I'm still of the thinking that mobile phones are a new invention!!! (I still believe I'm 18 in my head). Whereas the reality is, that phones are the norm. Everyone has one!!! I couldn't do without mine. Not only is it my phone, it's my diary, my reminders, my alarm clock, my compass, my GPR, my MP3, my social networking service, my texting service, my email checker, my twittering tool, my camera AND my period tracker!!!!! As a result, if you are anything like me, phones are indispensable! My daughter knows this. She has seen this. My daughter has grown up watching mummy with her phone, most of the time. Isn't is therefore, natural that she should ask for one for Christmas? So, i begin my parental list of pro's and cons....
Benefits?
* I know where she is, she has constant access to me. She fit in with peers. She can text and call her friends, Dad, grandparents, me.
* If she gets into trouble, feels lonely, needs help, money or a lift in the car, she can call.
*She can use it for educational purposes, she can have apps that help her with school work, take photos, scan QR tags, google and research on the spot, wherever she is.
Negatives?
* She'll use it everywhere, at school, at home, out. It will distract her from 'important' things, like homework.
* It is expensive. Although, getting much cheaper all the time.
* Will texting effect her grammar and spelling? Will she disappear into an invisible social world and not actually see anyone.
* She will call me for lifts, money, sweets. She may not develop independence as much as if she has to fend for herself, risk and work out problems on her own without reaching straight for the phone first.
*and lastly - the Internet. It brings up so so so so many safety issues for my little girl. I want her to have a childhood on the beach, in the mud, tangible with friends who we see and laugh with in person, not just online. I don't want to lose her to texts, social networks and browsing just yet. I do not feel ready to give her full, un-censored Internet access, when she is 7, vulnerable, and impressionable.
So, I guess I have to make a decision as to what to do, because Christmas is just around the corner. Am I being overprotective by not giving her a phone? Am I safeguarding her? Am I stifling her natural inquisitiveness to want to use mobile Internet as a tool for learning and socialising? She's growing up in a technology-rich world, naturally wanting to engage with it.... should I empower her or harness the desire?
So, any parents or peers with any thoughts?? Help! Does your child have a mobile / cell phone?!
Very interesting thoughts. To me, 7 does seem young to have full access to everything that a mobile phone has to offer. I could imagine thinking that a phone for safety reasons, or calling whenever she needs you would be a good idea, but I have to agree with your hesitation of putting the internet into the hands of not only your 7 year old, but then all the other kids who she would show it off too. Maybe a phone that has a camera and a few fun features, but that doesn't access the internet would be a good compromise for now. If it is for research purposes and browsing I'm sure there are computers in the home or school that she would have access too. Kids are growing up quickly...and yes, technology is important and will be a vital part of their lives, but so is creativity, problem solving, communication skills and 'in person' social interactions, which children need to be learning when they are young! I'm sure there will be lots of Christmases and Birthdays where technological items will top the list, but not as many left where you can offer gifts that will capture the imagination and creativity of a child.
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From Sarah via Facebook:
ReplyDeleteI have been having this exact same battle - i too would like to be able to contact them and vice verse when they are with their dad my initial instinct was secondary school age then have compromised and said 9 - he currently 8 but i will not be getting him one with intenet access - purely calls and texts. Also as for the independance thing , you have a very strong and independant young lady who will grow am am sure into a strong independant young woman just like her mother , with or without a mobile phone xxx
I think 7 is too young. Sam is 8 now and although he's a whizz on my phone playing games I don't think he needs one of his own. He's either with me, his dad, at school or friends house so doesn't need the use of one. Jasmine got hers when she was 10 before she went to secondary school but now shes 13 and spends all her time on it!! That's just my opinion tho. Good luck on making a decision xx
ReplyDeleteFirst thought was ... too young. I would prefer a pager myself, and I prefered reading all your cons about the phone. You already know what felt best, you just wished for confirmation. We do not have to have the same things as everyone else to be popular also ... we are popular for being ... Like YOU Jo!
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